I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
