I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
