Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She's the barista slut.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
