At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize