Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
