none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
