I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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