...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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