I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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