The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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