Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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