winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
