seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
