im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize