yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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