Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
