ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
