I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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