So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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