I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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