Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
We have so much sex to catch up on
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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