New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
