I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
