WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
