How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
