Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize