There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
It was like getting head from an anaconda
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
