I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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