I must be too annoying 4 u.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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