NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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