At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
