He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He did a backflip because drugs
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