u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
