...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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