I'm really into asian looking animals
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
