I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize
