just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Randomize
