How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
