Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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