why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
"it" just moved
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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