So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
can u get pink eye on your cock?
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
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