I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
