Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
And the cops told us we were all naked.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
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