theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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