I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
