so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize