No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Even my vagina gasped.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
