I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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