No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
