Three words: puerto rican gang bang
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
We're too hungover to prance.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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